just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I CAN MOONWALK!
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
