I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
