put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
