why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
