That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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