i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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