I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
