I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize
