apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
