when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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