remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
