My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
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