My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
