i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
