The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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