Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
