Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
