I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
