He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
