ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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