considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize