I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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