I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
