Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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