Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
