we have officially lost it.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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