She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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