HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Randomize
