how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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