TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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