I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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