Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
PANTIES FOUND
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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