Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
