nutella sex= disaster
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
