at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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