U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I understand Curling. That high.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize