that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize