My hand turned me down
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
