this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
