I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
