We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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