you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
you never un-have a 4some
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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