Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
