The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Shame - the story of my life.
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