Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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