ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
