You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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