You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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