Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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