Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
