We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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